Thursday, May 21, 2009

Marketing 101

"What is Marketing?


You see a handsome guy at a party.
You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."

-That's Direct Marketing


You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy.
One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says,
"She's fantastic in bed.

- That's Advertising.


You see a handsome guy at a party.
You go up to him and get his telephone number.
The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."

- That's Telemarketing.



You're at a party and see a handsome guy.
You get up and straighten your dress.
You walk up to him and pour him a drink.
You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie
brushing yourself slightly against his arm, and then say,
"By the way, I'm fantastic in bed.


- That's Public Relations.



You're at a party and see a handsome guy.
He walks up to you and says,
I hear you're fantastic in bed."

- That's Brand Recognition.


You're at a party and see a handsome guy.
You talk him into going home with your friend.
Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.

- That's Tech Support.


You're on your way to a party when you realize that there
could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing.
So you climb onto the roof of one situated toward the center
and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed

- That's Spam.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Can U Dance 2 My Beat


Can U Dance 2 My Beat

Beats United Radio 5 Yr Anniversary Party
Host:
Type:
Network:
Global
Start Time:
Saturday, May 30, 2009 at 10:00pm
End Time:
Sunday, May 31, 2009 at 4:00am
Location:
Chic Chinoise
Street:
214 King Street West (across from Roy Thompson Hall)
City/Town:
Toronto, ON

Phone:
6473099679
Email:

Description

“Beats United Radio", on the airwaves of CHRY 105.5FM for 5 years strong, started out as the legendary Rhythm Method (1989)/Deep Section (2000) with T.O.’s own Mitch Winthrop, Greg Gow and Nick Holder on Friday nights. After passing the torch to DJ’s Johnny Lopez and Jeff Graham and host Kimmy, the show was moved to Monday nights 11pm-1am and has showcased the finest in local and international talent such as Josh Milan (Blaze, NYC), “Jellybean” Benitez (ANBAHP, NYC) & DJ FLX (3 Degrees, CHI) to name a few…


And to help us mark the occasion we're importing one of The Leaders of the Deep House New School...


FILSONIK – (Syam – Objektivty - NYC)


From Louie Vega, Osunlade and Tony Touch to label mates Dennis Ferrer & The Martinez Bros, the company that Filsonik keeps is a true reflection of what his sound is all about… That Next Level Shit!!! Reared on a healthy diet of hip hop, latin disco, and reggae music on the city's Lower East Side, this production prodigy has spent the early part of ’09 re-mixing, re-editing and re-touching his crates in preparation for an all out assault on dance floors across the land… If you were lucky enough to catch any of his buzzed about sets this year @ WMC in Miami then you already know!!!



Setting the table will be...

Johnny Lopez + Jeff Graham
(Beats United Radio)

Tyrone Solomon
(Sweet Tears - 83 West)



With your hosts...

Taboo "The Life Of The Party"

Winston 'Frekkls' Fleming

Hyped? Ent & Kimmy

Ladies vs Real Women

Ladies
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

Real Women
If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too damn bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."

Ladies
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Real Women
Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?

Ladies
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

Real Women
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up, eating it anyway.

Ladies
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

Real Women
Buy boxed mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

Ladies
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the inside of the cake.

Real Women
Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate it for you.

Ladies
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Real Women
Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don't do it.

Ladies
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dish washing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Real Women
Go ask the very cute neighbor guy to do it.

And finally the most important tip!.....

Ladies
Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Real Women
Leftover wine??

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...that was fun!"

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Free Caribana Mixed Cd


TOMMOROW NIGHT IS THE OFFICAL RELEASE FOR THE HOT 97/BET ALL STAR CELEBRITY PARTY MIX CD (TORONTO VERSION) AT THE GUVERMENT LAST WEEK MONTREAL AND OTTAWA GOT THEIR VERSION TOMMOROW NIGHT ITS ALL ABOUT ILL KIDZ,SPEX AND D'ENFOCAS MIX CD! FREE FOR EVERYONE OVER 1500 COPIES WILL BE GIVEN AWAY. FOR THE 1ST 1O PEOPLE TO MESSAGE ME I WILL PUT U ON A FREE KONCEPT ENT GUEST LIST WHICH WILL RUN TO 1AM AND YOU WILL RECIVE YOUR COPY OF THE CD AND A LINE BY PASS UNTIL 1AM WHEN U WALK IN!!! CHECK OUT THE MONTREAL/OTTAWA VERSION OF THE HOT 97/BET CD MIXED BY DJ CAPONE AND EARTHQUAKE SOUND CREW
http://www.d_j_xtc.podomatic.com/

Friday, May 8, 2009

I am not from Trinidad but thought this was darn funny

11 Reasons Why We Trinis Cannot be Terrorists:


1. We are always late; we would have missed all 4 flights.

2. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.

3. With free food & drinks on the plane, we would forget what is the reason for our being there

4. We talk with our hands; therefore we would have to put our weapons down.

5. We would ALL want to fly the plane.

6. We would argue and start a fight on the plane.

7. We can't keep a secret; we would have told everyone a week before doing it.

8. We would have put our country's flag on the windshield...

9. We would have postponed the mission because a cricket match was going on that day

10. We would all have fallen over each other to be in the photograph being taken with one of the hostages.

11.We might be tired because of the mission briefing fete the night before.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Language of Women

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

My 40th ...

Yes I finally claimed it as that birthday and not 20 x 2 that I had originally advertised.
It has been almost 6 months since I turned that age. I spent the day linking pics and going through all the fun things from that night, that I remember. I can honestly say I am neither better or worse, richer or poorer ,happier nor sadder. It just has been another number for me.I have to admit with all the friends that came out and helped put it together it would never have been the best birthday I ever had. Ok maybe a correction is needed, the experience made me richer indeed



X Marks The Spot/Sagittarius Edition

Friday December 05 2008
feat

Starting from Scratch
( Amnesia ,Sweet Tears , Flow 93.5, Globe-radio.com)

Carl Allen
(Twilight Zone,Rockit, Sunshine Sounds,CKLN 88.1)

Pplus
(Originals ,Funk My Soul,Flow 93.5)

Jason Chambers
( Amnesia, 5 Mics, Attitude Sound Crew, FLOW 93.5)

Playing the best in Hip-hop,old school, RnB and House

Inside

EMPIRE LOUNGE
50 Cumberland St.
Yorkville, Toronto
(1 block north of Yonge & Bloor)
Doors Open @ 10pm until 2:00

Hosted by
John P Edwards
www.jonjay.ca
jonjayevents@gmail.com

Celebrating the milestone Birthday (20 x 2) of Neal McFarlane /djxtc